Well,I thought I heard them all,even used a few of the same ones when I was younger.Here is a new one from Tue. I hired a new cook last sat.We are closed on mon. so I had him start at 10 a.m. tue. 10.....10:30....11...no show....getting busy with lunch crowd...........call house at 3... Me: "Is XXXXX there" His wife:"he's in jail" Me;"what happened" Her:"He broke his glasses,when he came home last night he accidently walked in the wrong house and got arrested for trespassing" me:"........uh.....O.K."click!! Later got the whole story-was drunk as a skunk at midnight,10 hours before starting a new job!!!Actually did go in another house and got his azz kicked good by the homeowner.2 black eyes,concussion and broken jaw...was arrested at the hospital.(insert little smiliethings of shaking my head in disgust) Guess you can't fix stupid. Anyone else heard(or used ) some creative excuses,either true or made up?