What a Moron!

Discussion in 'Outdoor Articles' started by Catfish_Commando, Nov 18, 2005.

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  1. Catfish_Commando

    Catfish_Commando TF Staff Member

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    We have all seen it, people that go thru life oblivious to all around them. I sometimes wonder what was in their drinking water as a child.

    Ask yourself, why do people who have never owned a boat, always decide that it’s best to practice backing there boat down the public ramp on the weekend? Those empty 10 acre parking lots around town will not do! Then of course, once they have completed the task, they haven’t prepped the boat, removed the transom saver, transferred their fishing gear, bought their drinks and bait, or put in the plug.

    Then when they are done for the day, and the trucks line up, and the boats start to stack up, they feel it is necessary to allow their boat to slowly drain out while on the ramp. After 15 minutes, they finally realize this will take some time, and decide it best to move up unto the ramp to make way for their fellow fishermen. This is of course after slowly studying the amount of water that their boat held. Intently they stare at the hull, feeling that as time passes X-Ray vision will help deduce where the issue could be stemming from.

    Who was it that said there isn’t anything common about common sense? Sometimes you may want to slap some sense into a person!

    Hold up, could we be the problem?

    Let’s outline some of the things which bring the moron crosshairs racing upon a person’s chest. Be careful, some people are just hell bent on strapping a moron bomb to their chest, and declaring war on all common sense people.


    The public dock isn’t dry storage!

    Aren’t you the lucky one, you have spent a relaxing day on your local water and its time to get home. The sun is quickly disappearing and you eagerly motor your way back to the ramp, from a distance you can make out the faint outline(s) of many boats and people scurrying about. You think to yourself, great, this should go pretty fast. Once you reach your final destination, you quickly realize that a back slapping convention is going on; a Dock Hog is busy telling the story of how it got away. Earth to Dock Hog, earth to Dock Hog, when you see boats spinning around in circles, or holding position in front of the dock they are not trying to break in their outboards. Go get your truck, and move your boat. If you are going to be a while beach the bow of your boat. Yes, I know you paid your taxes to Uncle Sam, but so did they.

    Boats don’t run on good looks, and I am not pretty!

    Boat pirates are a growing phenomenon, and are not limited to the coast of South America. People who fish with friends who have a boat, throw him a bone! Even when they say NO to buying the gas, then get the bait, buy the drinks, or bring the food. Be a good sport and share in the expense. It’s ok to bum a few sinkers or hooks, but don’t turn someone else’s tackle box into a personal Wal-Mart.

    100’s of miles of riverbank, and they pick this spot?

    Ahhhh, you are sitting on the riverbank, beautiful weather, lines out, enjoying your favorite beverage. Out of all the limitless possibilities for a person in a boat to fish, they want to drop anchor in front of your lines. If you see a bank fisherman with lines out or not, let them enjoy some peace. If drift fishing, drift around them and not through their lines. Throw them a wave and a smile, and find another place.

    Don’t leave your trash, we aint your Momma!

    Empty tubs, cans, bottles, hook packages, cut-bait left on a dock, sandwich wrappers, and old tackle. If you take it in, bring it out. The large majority of us do our part and police up after ourselves. Yes, I know it sucks to pick up after someone else, but these people will not change. Make a goal when you go out, pick up one thing you see that you didn’t put there and place it in a trash receptacle.

    If it doesn’t start in the first 3 minutes, it’s not going to start!

    The smoke cloud slowly blows downwind across the crowd, young children rub their eyes and cry out in agony, “Mommy Mommy, me wittle eyes are stinging”!

    They get their boat successfully down the ramp and into the water, eagerly they jump out of the truck, enter the boat, trim the outboard down, and hit the outboard ignition!

    Errrr Errr Errr. Errrr Errr Errr. Errr Errr Err.

    Slight panic time sets in, come on baby, people are starting to stare. Squeeze bulb on the fuel line, check fuel can, check fuel line, ok, act cool, here we go!

    Errrrr Errr Errr. Errrr Errr Err. Errr Vrooommm Errr Err Err.

    Hmmmm, Nothing!

    Now is not the time to conduct major boat work. It’s not a working ramp, it’s a launching ramp. Move the boat off the ramp and take her home, tie it to the dock, or beach the boat. Clear the ramp, even though they don’t see anyone who needs to enter or exit, there is always somebody who needs to.

    100’s of miles of riverbank, and they pick this spot?

    Public boat ramps are places where people are constantly entering and exiting the water with thousands of pounds of uncontrollable boat. People will be inexperienced in boat control and truck control. If you are not mentally ready to be constantly reeling in your line, and giving them right of way, save yourself the aggravation. Yes they see your lines, but unlike the launch ramp fishermen, they have to be there. There are hundreds of miles of riverbank, why won’t they find another spot and save themselves the heartburn.

    Why do we have to pay for their stupidity!

    Some boat break-downs are unavoidable while on the water. The huge majority of people will stop, help, and tow a stranded boater to the nearest ramp. But please, take the appropriate preventative measures prior to hitting the water. Keys that fall into the water without a flotation device affixed, dead batteries, damaged boat plugs, clogged filters, lack of fuel, no extra fuses, and no tools are all preventable situations. We wont leave you stranded, but for heavens sake, we have better things to do than spend 2 hours towing you to the ramp for something that should not have happened. When we see you using a trolling motor headed upstream, and stop and ask if you need a tow, just say yes. Lets not waste time debating if you can make it, or what could be wrong, you can debate about it at the ramp. No small talk in the boat, we are doing the honor bound thing. Keep your head held low in shame, and throw in many thanks once we reach the destination.

    Let’s be considerate of each other, we're all after the same goals. Life is stressful enough without adding to the bubble. What moronic things have you witnessed while fishing your local waters?


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