Something to smile about.

Discussion in 'General Conversation' started by Angelkitty, Jan 25, 2008.

  1. Angelkitty

    Angelkitty New Member

    Messages:
    1,670
    State:
    Sheridan, Ar
    I love # 11. So true! But #20 had me laughing pretty hard..


    1. Do not walk behind me for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me alone.

    2 The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt or a leaky tire.

    3. It's always darkest before dawn , so if you're going to steal your neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.

    [FONT=Monotype
 Corsiva]4. Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.[/FONT]

    5. Always remember that you're unique. Just like everyone else.

    6. Never test the depth of the water with both feet.

    7. If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

    8. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.

    9. If at first you don't succeed...... skydiving is not for you.

    10. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat all day.

    11. If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.

    12. Some days you're the bug, some days you're the windshield.
    13. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

    14. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put back in your pocket.

    15. A closed mouth gathers no foot.

    16. Duct tape is like 'The Force'. It has a light side and a dark side, and it holds the universe together.

    17. There are two theories to arguing with a women - Neither one works.

    18. Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your lips are moving.

    19. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.

    20. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
     
  2. lawnman61

    lawnman61 New Member

    Messages:
    1,694
    State:
    Fort Worth, Tex
    Gotta say #20 was the best.. got me laughing :smile2:
     

  3. Plowboy411

    Plowboy411 New Member

    Messages:
    918
    State:
    Georgia
    That is a lot of truth in one post.LOL:smile2:
     
  4. willcat

    willcat New Member

    Messages:
    2,463
    State:
    texas
    Those are all pretty good, thanks for the read!!!
     
  5. Mickey

    Mickey New Member Supporting Member

    Messages:
    14,592
    State:
    Illinois
    Thanks for a sharing. #20 was my pick also. Funny!!!!