I am blessed to live on a property with an abundance of wildlife. This includes wild turkey. I have had em' in the barn-lot with our tame turkeys when we used to have them. Usually spook 3-4 nesting hens every spring while hunting mushrooms, as I did yesterday. This situation is like having a good lookin' wife that cooks good. Your buddies all want to buy her a glass of wine. The same with turkey-they all want to hunt here. I don't hunt them and haven't in the 24 years I have lived here, so I'll let a certain few hunt. These are the kind of guys who have every turkey hunting DVD known to man. They are on 3 turkey internet forums. Have every camo combination imaginable. Have enough face chalk to give a kindergarten school a weeks supply of coloring material. Own box calls, mouth calls, bone calls. They drive their wife and dog insane for a week before season practicing calling. They quit drinking beer 3 days before season cause they don't want to have to take a leak while on stand. They show up to hunt looking like a member of A Special-Ops team ready to invade Iran. Their Mossberg is so camoed up if they dropped it they couldn't find it. They go out and come back with nothin' but excuses. Now I have another buddy who wanted to hunt this year. A complete novice. I tell him where they roost this time of year and how to get there. He shows up to hunt in a pair or Carhuts and a John Deere cap, uncases an 870 Wingmaster a few 2 1/2" shells and heads for the woods. Finds a nice Burr Oak, parks his butt against it and waits. Dawn comes, the turkeys get down off their posts and he waits. He's sitting there picking his nose smoking a cigarette when this braindead, DUMBA$$ jake strolls by in deep thought about becoming a real turkey. My buddy levels on him and rolls him at 25 yards. Walks over picks up the thrashing turkey and gets his hand gashed by one of those little spurs. He comes back to my houseyard, turkey slung over his back grinning like an ape. Throws the turkey in his pick-up and we shoot the fat awhile. As he's leaving he asks me if I know how clean the damn thing! So now I think I'm gonna uncase my 870 next year.