Lost a close friend.

Discussion in 'General Conversation' started by bluehunter, Feb 1, 2007.

  1. bluehunter

    bluehunter New Member

    Messages:
    3,004
    State:
    Los Angele
    Never have I thought that I would lose a close friend who touched so many people in so many ways. Its truly been a rough week for me emotionally and mentally as I lost a close companion in Adam Flanagan.

    Adam and I went back to 1988 almost 20 years ago when I met him in Hawkinsville, Ga. I was sent to Georgia in the 11th grade to escape the gang activity that i was involved in California, and to get myself together. The first guy that I met after moving in with my Grandmother and entering the High School was Adam Flanagan, who was welcoming to me and introduced me to his friends and family. He made my transition easier once there and since then we been great friends. We had great times together in High school for the year that I was there and have many great stories. I later came back to california to graduate but still went to Ga every year and even attending college there until 93. We always keep and touch and saw eah other.

    In an attempt to change his life from dealing drugs and the death of his brother to the drug game at the age of 18 being shot in the head and left out on the street to die, Adam decided to make a change for the good. He Joined the United States Navy and wa stationed in Alameda, California for a few year. I helped drive him to California and was basically his intoducer to my home state of california. He later transfered to San Diego and was even closer to me. He visited my house often on Sundays to have a meal and to watch games and hang out. We did so much things together like chase girls, go to the beach, the usual young guy things. My parents loved him and trated him like a son throughout his early years in Cali during the 90's. He married a beatiful lady and had a family. Adam later joined the Marines after his time was up in the Navy, serving 2 tours in Iraq. We always kept in touch. Adam knew how much of a fishing fanatic I was and would always let me stay in his house when I was fishing in San Diego, which is a 2 hr drive south of my home. I would go to his house the night before and then get up and go fishing. This would happen frequently on weekends.

    Adam joined a motorcycle club called Twisted in San Diego 3 years ago and rode sport motorcycles as a hobby. Lots of his marine fallas was in the group as well as civilians. He loved the club and would talk about them often. He even tried to get me into the hobby and I am still looking into a motorbike at this time. He rode with passion and great enthusiam. His life was tragically ended whe he died on his bike a week and a half ago after under estimating a curve at a high rate of speed. He ran into the median.

    I got the news while at work in the morning and was at a funk and still is to some extent. I attended the wake and the funeral and was amazed at how many people were there. There was a memorial ride for him in which well over 500 people and bikers participated in. Adam touched a lot of people. He had lots of friends. He was a great companion to others who always gave encouraging advice as well as cheered people up from there down moments. I talked to lots of people who were aorund them and heard great stories about him and how much he helped them and cheered them up with laughter and joy and jokes. There was laughter at the service when people spoke about him, as well as tears. I had no idea that I had a great friend who was loved by so many. I was proud of him aseeing how he progressed from being who he was in the past to how he was now. A respectful honorable man and provider for his family.

    I heard from adam a week before he died. he left a message on my answering machine in which he said " Brian if you need anything, give me a call" He also said to get my act together after I had an argument with a sister after she called him, He said "I am better than that." I did not answer the phone call when he called but listened to the message. A week later, I found out that he was killed.

    I as still low about this and did not work today to try to deal with this lost, but I learned a lesson from Adam that will be with me for life. Live Life to the fullest, be friendly. There was not many people that did not like him. And if he did not know you, he would know you after a general conversation as he was very sociable. Be a good family man and provider like he was. He loved his children and wife and would do anything for them. And just be there for people when they call on you. I will truly miss Adam and I loved him like he was my brother. Please pray for my transitioning and growth after this loss. I had to share this with somebody, so I choose my BOC family. Thanks for taking the time to read this.

    Brian.
     
  2. Pennsylvaniacatchaser

    Pennsylvaniacatchaser Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    11,341
    State:
    Sarver, Pa
    Brian - Sorry to hear of the loss of your friend! I read your whole post and can see how much he meant to you. Hang in there brother!
     

  3. luke1wcu

    luke1wcu New Member

    Messages:
    56
    State:
    North Carolina
    My prayers are with you brother. Always remember to be thankful for all he has taught you both before and after life. My mother always said that it is only so hard because it was so good. For me, remembering that makes it much easier to deal with overall. There are always gonna be difficult times but they wouldn't be that way if it wasn't all ultimately worth it. Thoughts and prayers are with you. Stay strong!
     
  4. MRR

    MRR New Member

    Messages:
    4,947
    State:
    Louisiana,Mo.
    Brian I am at a loss for words except to say your good friend may be gone physhically but he will always be with you long as you don't let his memory fade. Just remember all the good and fun things you did together sounds like you havea life time of memerioes.Will be saying a prayer for you at this time of sorrow and also for his wife and children.GOD BLESS and STAY SAFE.
     
  5. james_s333

    james_s333 New Member

    Messages:
    252
    State:
    byesville,ohio
    my preys are sent out to you....i feel you cause im from cleveland and i lost a good friend to the gang thing....sense that ive been doing nothing but tring my best to improve myself i find it hard cause he is the one that kept me out of gangs even though he was in a gang...and it is hard to find ppl that you can confind in...but i am sry you lost a friend that ment so much to you
     
  6. bootshowl

    bootshowl New Member

    Messages:
    2,288
    State:
    Indiana, J
    Brian sorry for your loss. Sounds like a lot of peoples loss. Just a reminder if there was a memorial run for yer buddy, there should be patches as well. Contact someone of the bikers & inquire. Just a small retangle patch you can put on your vest, " In Memory of...." Keeps your brother in the wind. I've got too many on my vest. Know what yer feeling. God Bless.
     
  7. gilmafam

    gilmafam Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    5,466
    State:
    California
    Brian, sorry to hear about your loss of Adam.......

    I had a feeling that something other than the xterra was happening, almost did an email to you back a bit....

    One of my neighbors.... of 30 years moved closer to the beach about 1 block from the beach or by the Redondo Beach Pier... Billy Williams... "coach" as all in the Compton USD called him.... was a dear and close friend of mine.... we went to continuing ed. classes together... shared alot of basketball,football etc.... he booked, his dad booked... it was blood in his life....
    Scoundral he was..... but we all loved him.... His service was down town ... and my family and several of our neighbors were the only whites at the service....As I looked at him laying there in his casket... he almost spoke to me......He was just as I have seen him so many times before as he would just fade away as he was talking ....somewhat... nodding his head occasionally..... as he would just go to sleep while talking to you...."I can do the same".....
    Damm.... we had more fishing to do together.

    He would visit his mom and Auntee often when they were in town, as Texarcana was the other place they shared a house depending on the weather....We would drive up to LA to take mom and auntee to church, so that he would do some mom time..... and weed then go do this and that and visit folks in compton..

    He up and passed away in his sleep.... which was without pain....
    "darn paramedics station is just around the corner... took almost seconds for them to come there in the middle of the night, but ..... they could not bring him back. the reeper took him to fast....

    He had just retired.... not from drinking... but from teaching and he was fixing up his new "old old house"..... with a woman that he had never married, but was with her...30 years or so....
    He would piss her off so much with all that he did.... but he kept comming back, and he could cook good too ......so that helped.

    You have shared much with Adam bro, and I can tell that he was close to you and will be with you at san vee everytime that you head on down that way.....

    Hang tough Brian... "thanks for the tip on SAR" got to go and have a brew for an ole buddie.... wont get to stupid, but I need it, and fishing is a place to check ones self out once in a while... If you know what I mean!

    bayrunner ray
     
  8. ersel

    ersel New Member

    Messages:
    1,164
    State:
    Haughton Louisiana
    Sorry to hear of your loss.
     
  9. splitshot

    splitshot New Member

    Messages:
    2,827
    State:
    Coxsakie,N.Y.
    I am sorry to hear of your loss brother, but i can tell from your post that your friend brought much joy into your life. Guard those memories in your heart and he will always be with you.
     
  10. shania

    shania New Member

    Messages:
    5,942
    State:
    San Leandro, Ca
    Hey B. H.,
    I'm so sorry to hear about the lost "anyone". I see that he was a dear friend to you as Phillip (Deltalover) was to me.

    So you know that I fill Ya. :sad_2a:

    Adam will be in Shania:0010: & My prayers as well as yourself & his family.

    Just look at it this way Buddy:

    :worship: "Adam" & :worship: "Phil" are looking down on us right now & you know that they will be there anytime we need them.
    :still_dreaming:

    You Stay-up & Take Care,
    Bert:cool2: & Shania:0010:

    :worship: :0a23:
    Bert & Phil

    :worship: :boss:
    B.H. & Adam
     
  11. teaysvalleyguy

    teaysvalleyguy New Member

    Messages:
    9,751
    State:
    GC, OHIO
    Great post about a great friend. Sorry to hear about his loss. It sounds like he brightened the lives of many.
     
  12. Flintman

    Flintman New Member

    Messages:
    710
    State:
    OKC, OKLA.
    Brian, my heart is heavy for your loss. I have lost 4 close friends in the last 5 years. But John is right, if we keep the memories alive we will always have a part of them with us.
    It doesn't help the pain now, but will give us joy later.
    God Bless, my prayer is for your comfort,and peace, in your time of loss.

    Flint
     
  13. fish

    fish Active Member

    Messages:
    1,573
    State:
    ChattanoogaTenn
    Brian, we are so sorry that a great part of your life has gone on. It is always hard to let go, but you know he would not want you to be down, he would have wanted you to hold your head up and march forward, carrying his memory in your heart as you are right now and will continue to do. We are here to help carry your load buddy. We will keep you and his family in our prayers.
     
  14. pk_powell

    pk_powell New Member

    Messages:
    3,485
    State:
    Missouri
    Brian, I read your entire post and it left tears in my eyes and running down my cheeks. I am so sorry for you my brother! Do as Gary Bootshowl suggested and get one of those little patches he was talking about. Keep the "precious memories" running strong in your life,and then your buddy will always be close. You are in my prayers as well as his wife and family. God Bless and Keep you in your time of sorrow!:sad2:
     
  15. waterwalker

    waterwalker New Member

    Messages:
    604
    State:
    Louisville Ohio
    Thank you, very well written. Tough when you lose a friend.
     
  16. Hope

    Hope New Member

    Messages:
    1,177
    State:
    Oklahoma
    Brian, I'm so sorry to read about this great loss. It's good that you're allowing time to grieve your friend and my thoughts are with you.
    Thank you for sharing with us the memorial you've written here for him and I'm praying that you'll find comfort and peace through this difficult time.
     
  17. flathead willie

    flathead willie Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    3,241
    State:
    Virginia
    I'm very for your loss. It sounds like he was a great guy. He will never be gone as long as friends like you remember him.
     
  18. guns sugar

    guns sugar New Member

    Messages:
    120
    State:
    Georgia
    Brian... my prayers are with you brother... your friend ,Adam sounds like one heck of a good man... he is looking after his family in spirit and he will look after u too... prayers for his wife and children also from your sister in North GA. God Bless You and the Lord will never leave you.

    hugss, Karolyn
     
  19. Lngbo

    Lngbo New Member

    Messages:
    622
    State:
    Marion Ark
    Brian, So sorry to hear about your loss, there are never any words that can make these things any better. I just always try to remember the times that were spent with the person. Try to keep the memories alive.
     
  20. 223reload

    223reload New Member

    Messages:
    10,798
    State:
    Oklahoma
    So sorry for yor loss Brian its hard to deal with any one who is close wheather friend or family ,time heals but memories always remain . Im glad you had great memories with such a true friend