How many have you heard?

Discussion in 'General Conversation' started by Cattledogz, May 14, 2006.

  1. Cattledogz

    Cattledogz New Member

    Messages:
    1,374
    State:
    NC
    I love and appreciate my mother very much. But boy, she for one stated the phrases below so many times during my childhood that I think they will be forever burned into my memory....LOL

    Many of us have heard our mothers say most, if not all of the phrases below while she was raising us
    .

    I OWE MY MOTHER :smile2:

    1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
    "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."

    2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
    "You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

    3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
    "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

    4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
    "Because I said so, that's why."

    5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
    "If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

    6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
    "Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

    7. My mother taught me IRONY.
    "Keep crying, and I 'll give you something to cry about."

    8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
    "Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

    9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
    "Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"

    10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
    "You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

    11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
    "This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

    12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
    "If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

    13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
    "I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

    14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
    "Stop acting like your father!"

    15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
    "There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

    16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
    "Just wait until we get home."

    17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
    "You are going to get it good when you get home!"

    18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
    "If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way"

    19. My mother taught me ESP.
    "Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

    20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
    "When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."

    21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
    "If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

    22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
    "You're just like your father."

    23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
    "Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

    24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
    "When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

    25. Last but not least: My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
    "One day you'll have kids, and I hope they act just like you so you'll have to go through what you put me through!"
     
  2. Ol Man

    Ol Man New Member

    Messages:
    3,170
    State:
    Illinois
    Actually, aren't those an addendum to the 10 Commandments..?:lol:

    _______________
    I was thinking about how the status symbols of today is either pagers or cell phones that everyone has clipped on. I can't afford either one, so I'm wearing my TV's remote control.....
     

  3. Coloman

    Coloman New Member

    Messages:
    441
    State:
    Soddy Daisy, Tn
    The dreaded Mothers curse!

    I hope you have kids that act like just like you!!!

    IT WORKS
     
  4. Mutt

    Mutt Administrator Staff Member Supporting Member

    Messages:
    18,497
    State:
    Ca
    Name:
    Mutt
    heh I remember all of them lol. But there was a twist on the kids bit for me it was I hope they are ten times worse then I was lolol thanks for a good post.
     
  5. copycat

    copycat New Member

    Messages:
    1,841
    State:
    New Jersey
    [quote=Cattledogz
    24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
    "When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

    OK, OK! I understand now, so can I go back and do things the way I should have done them? PLEASE!!
     
  6. armynavy

    armynavy New Member

    Messages:
    422
    State:
    Iowa
    Never realized how much mom had taught me until that post thanks, now I know why she calls me a smartarse, lol. Its all her fault for teaching me so much.
     
  7. pursuing_cats

    pursuing_cats New Member

    Messages:
    247
    State:
    Clarksville,Tennessee
    How true, how true! My mom always said she hoped my kids did me the same way I did her and my dad. The funny thing is, I don't ever remember being that BAD! God Bless all the Mothers in the World for they have the toughest job of us all!!!!!
     
  8. AllenM

    AllenM Guest


    Boy, howdy! You hit the nail on the head with that one, copycat! All the things i'd have done differently.... Geez!!

    And as for having kids as bad as we were, you should see my little boy Derek in action! :crazy: