Forewarned is forearmed:

Discussion in 'General Conversation' started by postbeetle, Jul 24, 2007.

  1. postbeetle

    postbeetle New Member

    Messages:
    6,598
    State:
    Iowa
    I issue this challenge to the BOC staff moderators. Sometime in the next two to four months I am going to write a story that contains sex (taboo here), violence (taboo here unless you are skinning catfish alive, that is allowed), political intrigue (allowed only in High Intensity and run by Plumbertom and Danzig)

    This story will be for the older members of this forum, of which there are quite a few. I have to write this soon, before their eyesight fails and they can't see the monitor screen. Some younger members may read it to see if we are crazy, which I know you think we are. My challenge to you is to stop me. LOL! (Quote from Katfshn50)

    The Supreme Allied Commander (Military Mike) will have to be recalled from Iraq to set up fortifications. He will be on a white horse, sword drawn, that hat on he wears. He will be as handsome as General Robert E. Lee. Eithne and Jholl949 will be in boat repair, thinking I may attack from sea. Eithne will be behind the barrel of a 50 cal. with Jholl949 feeding the ribbon for her. Jholl949 will also be guarding Eithnes makeup bag. Cattledogz will be in the BOC diner, thinking I may make an end run through the cafeteria. She is making pies for the troops. Of course she has her 45 handy next to the rolling pin. Mark J has set up a firing position in Homemade Baits. He really likes the stink of catfish bait. Of course he is carrying a non-issue Uzi. He likes to see the bullets actually come out of his gun. Dademoss will be over in South American Cat fishing sharpening his bayonet. He knows this could be close combat. Maybe he will shave as well while he's at it. Itchtoscratch and Deerhunter01 will be place in High Intensity Forum carrying the heavy stuff. Howizers, mortars, tanks. That is a rough neighborhood. They are trying to recruit Plumbertom and Danzig but they can't get them to hold hands.

    My attack will be pre-dawn and I will be camoed. Won't give you a time because I don't know when I'll get out of bed to write the story. It will be a banzai attack, in and out quickly. My escape route may be East. Catfshn50 has promised to keep his engine motor running. I have always wanted to see England. Irish Mike (The Barse) has promised the use of his pub. I may go West. Some of the boys out that way have promised the use of their potato cellars. I really don't want to go South. My only rations would be okra. I don't know how to cook that stuff. Won't go North cause I just don't understand those Canadians. I know ol' Spitshoot has gotten his lawn chair out and has made himself comfortable for this bloodbath. I hope he takes that piece of paper out of his mouth. That makes my teeth hurt.

    I will make some feints, testing your position before then. All I can tell you now is lock and load! May the best keyboard win. LOL!

    Postbeetle
     
  2. Pirate Jerry

    Pirate Jerry New Member

    Messages:
    613
    State:
    Yulee Florida
    Seeing as how you are writing the story for people in the ALMOST over the hill gang, (of which I are one) You might want to form an underground force before we are underground. If you have to use a Southern escape route count me in, I can furnish you with BBQ and grits, okra ain't fit to eat anyhow...... Hurry up with the story before I forget why I want to see it.
    Oh yeah, I can mount a few iron horse cavalry if needed
     

  3. Phil Washburn

    Phil Washburn New Member

    Messages:
    7,680
    State:
    Shawnee OK
    John, my wife cooks the best okra in the state and we have a spare room....my 5 dogs will keep even D.H. at bay...you'll be safe here and won't have to deal with those yankees:smile2:
     
  4. BIG GEORGE

    BIG GEORGE New Member

    Messages:
    10,362
    State:
    JOISY
    The motors runnin. I would like to volunteer for post action occupation when the onslaught is over. AHHHH! The spoils of war. LOL!
     
  5. Mark J

    Mark J New Member

    Messages:
    9,407
    State:
    Four Oaks, NC
    Fellow staff members, this is another wannabe.
    Pull out the okra guns.
     
  6. dademoss

    dademoss New Member

    Messages:
    524
    State:
    Ohio
    Fat chance on the shaving part:tounge_out:

    Been a long time since I fixed the bayonet on the end of the rifle, hope I can remember how:cool2:
     
  7. baitchunker

    baitchunker New Member

    Messages:
    1,689
    State:
    alabama
    hmmmmm.....

    i aint as dusty as most but i do like a good war of words john. by the way, the good ol folks down around my place like okra just fine as long as it is in gumbo, or deep fried so that it tastes just like everything else we eat.

    j.d.
     
  8. splitshot

    splitshot New Member

    Messages:
    2,827
    State:
    Coxsakie,N.Y.
    Ill have a cold one ready for you and BG, just in case you have to detour my way. Sorry about yer teeth hurtin!!:0a19:
     
  9. bootshowl

    bootshowl New Member

    Messages:
    2,288
    State:
    Indiana, J
    John how do you tell the difference between Iowa & Nebraska? Also I didn't think any of those vices existed in either state.....thought it was all corn and baseball. But if you write it, guess they will read. Corpsman standing by in southern Indiana if ya make a run south east.....Make for the Ohio, & I'll pick you up at Duffy's landing.
     
  10. Eithne

    Eithne New Member

    Messages:
    408
    State:
    OK

    ............ :eek:oooh:

    HAHAHAHAHA :smile2:

    John (mcclinj) might think he was in the wrong house if he came home and saw a makeup bag on the table. :tounge_out:

    Where would that fit in a tackle box? :wink:
     
  11. Cattledogz

    Cattledogz New Member

    Messages:
    1,374
    State:
    NC
    Hate to tell ya John, but you are already sunk. You see you forgot the one that will sneak up on ya when you least expect it and he will get ya! :smile2:

    Its Whistler to the whescue!!! ROFL
     
  12. postbeetle

    postbeetle New Member

    Messages:
    6,598
    State:
    Iowa
    I have had my spies out for awhile. Watch your cell phone and your computer. The resistance is everywhere! He is just the Librarian. You take away their Dewey Decimal system and they are just as human as we are. Just another man with a fishing pole. Cherry, peach, apple, pumpkin, blueberry, strawberry, lemon, raisin, pecan, or chocolate? What are ya making the troops? Ain't this fun.? Catfish Commando will need another brigade. Do you think Rumsfeld will ok the fund dispersal? God i love this place!

    John
     
  13. trippyclwn

    trippyclwn Member

    Messages:
    603
    State:
    Chattanooga, Tn
    Name:
    Tracey
    catfish commando? that is paul! and he is what i call central intelligence and the creator of this virtual world of catfishing and good times! he is the one that brought people together so he is the commander in chief here. and he has always been fair.
    so once again i ask "what are we fighting for fellow b.s.o.c. members?" :confused2:
     
  14. postbeetle

    postbeetle New Member

    Messages:
    6,598
    State:
    Iowa
    Volunteers are volunteering. The underground railroad continues to lay track. Intelligence reports are promising. We know they have weapons of mass destruction hidden in their servers, it's their satellite connection that is the weak link. Cut the head off and we have them.

    The Stars and Bars and the Stars and Stripes are now being carried side by side. There is no longer a Mason-Dixon line. United we stand in a common purpose. One for all and all for one. Officers are being commissioned as we speak. Problems are arising there that will have to be solved. Everybody wants to be the head honcho. I have to get Cheryl to hand out the ratings. Nobody will give her any lip. They keep complaining about not getting any awards, whatever that means.

    Ah, the stirring sights and sounds of grim faced men preparing for battle. They slap cold steel to their burly forearms. The clank of sabers, the jingle of spurs and bridles. Horses are nervous, swirling the dust at their feet. The beer tent and latrines are jammed. Note to Staff Sergeant Tea. (get another truckload of beer laid in.)

    There is some guy in a lawn chair over on the hill. He doesn't even have a fishing pole. Just sits there watching. Will send a re-con patrol over to see if he has a ticket to this ball. He is probably a gate crasher, or a malingerer.

    Incidentally you kind folks who have commented on the okra situation. Martha Stewart e-mailed me last nite. She gave me an excellent recipe using okra. Mixed with corn and oats it make an excellent hog ration.

    Until the next SitRep ya all enjoy the day.
     
  15. BIG GEORGE

    BIG GEORGE New Member

    Messages:
    10,362
    State:
    JOISY
    Staff Seargant Tea! LOL! You mean "Staff Infection" don't ya. LOL!
     
  16. dademoss

    dademoss New Member

    Messages:
    524
    State:
    Ohio
    Doomed , Doomed I say.

    Perimeter of looper rigs covered in magic bait and tripwires tied to katbobbers.

    Even filled the moat with giant ravenous flatheads:smile2:

    You will never take the Twinkies!

    Wait, you have a BEER Tent?
     
  17. postbeetle

    postbeetle New Member

    Messages:
    6,598
    State:
    Iowa
    That's a big gun there ol' Dade. My boys will have to bring up canon to go against that. I don't see any pig sticker on the front. Haven't got it sharp enough yet eh?
     
  18. postbeetle

    postbeetle New Member

    Messages:
    6,598
    State:
    Iowa
    You do know the front end don't you? Is it duck season now. Just a little early for duck under glass.
     
  19. postbeetle

    postbeetle New Member

    Messages:
    6,598
    State:
    Iowa
    That's a penguin, not a duck. Never ate one of those. Do they go good with okra?
     
  20. anchorpuller

    anchorpuller New Member

    Messages:
    857
    State:
    North Caro
    I tried to bring my signs of "Make Love Not War" and march the perimeter, but I found this ole geezer guarding it. He skeered me back, taking my sign with me.
     

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