CANCER

Discussion in 'General Conversation' started by catman-j, Jan 1, 2010.

  1. catman-j

    catman-j New Member

    Messages:
    1,020
    State:
    Eastern Nebr
    My dad has stage 3 lung cancer. He is about to start his second round which will be a double dose of what it was before. He is getting very mean and hateful to everyone around him. He is angry that God let this happen to him but nobody ever put a gun to his head and made him smoke all those cigarettes. He has always been very stubborn. He won't let anyone tell him what to do to take care of himself so he is going downhill very fast. Anyone ever deal with someone going through this?
     
  2. kawriverrat

    kawriverrat Member

    Messages:
    143
    State:
    KANSAS
    Very sorry to hear about this type thing from any one. I have seen your Dad's reaction to this situation in others.
    When some one finds out they have cancer there are different stages of response that a lot of folks go through. The first one, a lot of times is denial mixed with anger.

    At some time or another we all must cross a bridge we have built.
    I am really sorry to hear this. I will be praying for your Dad!!
     
    Last edited: Jan 1, 2010

  3. bownero

    bownero New Member

    Messages:
    3,137
    State:
    Hastings, Ne.
    Jeff! I understand what your dealing with!! My father-in-law, is battling lung cancer to. He chooses still to smoke those cigarettes, and knows the harm they do!! But yet he will not listen "stubborn"!! It's very painful watching him suffer through this. Countless days of Chemotherapy. His weight at the time when diagnosed with cancer was at 230lbs. Now he weighs at a frail 165lbs!! I can't understand why he still chooses to smoke and deal with the chest busting coughing. I know the doctors told him it was to late to quit, buy why not improve on things by quitting. Why deal with the pain? I guess, deep down inside, he knows the days are ticking and chooses to leave with a bang. It's sad to see!!

    My prayers go out to you and your family Jeff!! Keep the head up and be thankful for what you have!!
     
  4. oh no

    oh no New Member

    Messages:
    11,108
    State:
    Indiana
    Some people handle cancer differently than others,,,,cancer is nothing but a thing,,,, some of the so called cures are worse than the disease itself.

    I have not had the lung cancer deal,,,, but I have been cut on for the bladder cancer deal,,,, it all hurts,,,,

    Just accept the fact, that not all people, deal with there own impending doom the same way..

    Death can be very scary,,,,,,,,,,the thought of not knowing the outcome of operations can be scary...

    Just Hang in There and Give him comfort where/when you can...

    Don't get on a person for smoking or chewing...............Whats going to happen,,,,,they get cancer,,,,Hell they already have it,,,,let them enjoy themselves...if smoking or whatever makes them happy ,, let them enjoy LIFE,,,,,,,,,,It's the Last Life they have.
     
  5. katmax

    katmax New Member

    Messages:
    1,070
    State:
    griffin ga
    its a bad thing but we cant blame god.....hes had a plan for each and everyone of us and this is just part of his plan....i will keep yall in my prayers.
     
  6. Mickey

    Mickey New Member Supporting Member

    Messages:
    14,592
    State:
    Illinois
    Jeff Prayers sent from, So. Illinois.
     
  7. arkrivercatman

    arkrivercatman New Member

    Messages:
    4,472
    State:
    KS
    I lost my Dad almost 4 years ago to the same thing, lung cancer.I watched him take his last breath and was there to see him wither away. Looking back I think we would have chosen not to go through with the chemo as that is what made things go down hill faster.
    We all know that cigarettes cause cancer, but what doesnt? My Dad was a carpenter, and he breathed in his fair share of asbestos, sheetrock and concrete dust, and probably a million other things that were a part of his job. All of those things combined were probably worse than those cigarettes.
    Lots of people who have never smoked a day in their life have gotten lung cancer, wonder how they got it? There are dozens of different cancers you can get, some with no known cause. How? Why? No one knows.
    We will all die one day, no matter what we do. Cancer, car wreck, boating accident, drowning, the list goes on and on.
    Thats a decision we dont get to make.
    Live and let live.
    Prayers sent to you and your Dad Jeff. Enjoy every minute with him.
     
  8. catman-j

    catman-j New Member

    Messages:
    1,020
    State:
    Eastern Nebr
    Thanks everyone!
     
  9. Rollinunknown

    Rollinunknown New Member Supporting Member

    Messages:
    2,286
    State:
    Missouri
    Jeff... man all i gotta say is im very sorry to hear this and spend as much time as you can with him ..

    i have lost a few people in my family due to this and its very rough ride all you can do is try to help kill the pain.
     
  10. BIG_D

    BIG_D New Member

    Messages:
    8,107
    State:
    Batchtown IL.
    Jeff i have bin there with Mom and Dad i know it is hard to deal with God bless you and yours
     
  11. gamaCatsu

    gamaCatsu New Member

    Messages:
    219
    State:
    NC
    jeff , my uncle passed away a few years ago from lung cancer, caused by smoking for 30+years. he also got very mad sometimes about the smallest things. it was a side effect from the chemo.
    He also went down hill very fast, only thing you can do is try to keep a smile on your face to lift there spirits as hard as it may be, an comfort them in such a time of need. he lived for 3 years after his last treatment, it came back more aggressive...i hope and pray that god willing your dad will pull through. some people just dont realize how nasty and such a horrible thing cancer can be.:confused2:

    ill pray for u tonight. god bless you and your family!
     
  12. tofish

    tofish New Member

    Messages:
    3,923
    State:
    arizona
    Jeff, i know exactly what you are going through. i've been through it personally myself. had and beat cancer myself. did the chemo and radiation and mood swings. my father and uncle both lost to it. it's a emotional experience that people can only amagine unless they go through it with someone and never fully understand if not going through it themself.
    always make yourself stay positive, smile around him and be positive in all you say to him. remember, sometimes what he says may not be what he really wants to say.
    i'll pray for all of your family.
    gary
     
  13. Flightline

    Flightline New Member

    Messages:
    42
    State:
    Oklahoma
    I feel for you, I lost my uncle and grandfather to lung cancer. It was tough seeing them go through all the treatments. I'm praying for you and your family.

    As for God causing it, he is naturally angry and the medicine causes us to act differently, God has a plan and we may not know how he intends to use this for his glory but he will. God is good and loves us all. He never gives us more than we can handle.

    We will all die one day we don't like to think about it of course. we never know how we will react when our time comes. I'm praying for you brother.
     
  14. olefin

    olefin New Member

    Messages:
    3,908
    State:
    Texas
    Jeff, I'm sorry to hear the news.

    My father in law was diagnosed with lung cancer, he elected no treatment. He was fortunate, for he soon died from a heart attack and stroke.

    I recently lost an old friend from throat cancer. He had chewed tobacco for many years.
     
  15. psychomekanik

    psychomekanik New Member

    Messages:
    2,534
    State:
    Illinois
    Jeff, I've watched several people in my family, and my best friends dad (he was like my dad) die from lung cancer. The treatments will make them very irritable. But, there's one thing that makes it worse. People complaining to them about smoking. The dr. is right it's too late for quitting to help. And if he quits now it will stress him out even further making things worse. trying to quit smoking now could be the worse thing for him. Just stay positive and try to make him as comfortable as possible. And don't rag on him about smoking. He knows what caused it. And let him know you're there. I send prayers to you guys. These are very trying times..
     
  16. flathead willie

    flathead willie Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    3,241
    State:
    Virginia
    My wife and I have been dealing with the same type of thing for several years, but it all ended on New Years eve. My brother-in-law didn't have cancer, but it seems like that is the only thing he didn't have. He basically gave up several years ago and refused to take care of himself by eating properly, exercising, or checking his blood sugar. Every few months he would wind up back in ICU. At 7pm New Years eve he passed away while at the V.A Hospital in Salem Va. He will be cremated tomorrow.
     
  17. Blacky

    Blacky New Member

    Messages:
    10,351
    State:
    Philadelphia, P
    My dad had abdominal cancer and still smokes today.

    I can't tell him to quit because I smoke myself.
     
  18. catman-j

    catman-j New Member

    Messages:
    1,020
    State:
    Eastern Nebr
    He quit 18 years ago.
     
  19. catman-j

    catman-j New Member

    Messages:
    1,020
    State:
    Eastern Nebr
    Why????
     
  20. holliswood

    holliswood Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    1,803
    State:
    King, NC
    I've had family members that passed away from brain, breast, colon, lung, and stomach cancer. Just be there for them in there time of need and don't be affraid to tell them that you love them. Comforting them also helps alot. Compassion
     
    Last edited: Jan 10, 2010